of course how selfish of me

by Laila Krajcik 4 min read

What is a Selfish Person?

A selfish person is someone who is overly concerned with themselves. They have a terminally self absorbed mindset, and they do things to serve themselves, even if the actions will harm others.

1. They Are Concerned Only with Their Own Needs

A selfish person puts themself first. It doesn’t matter what others are going through, the person will care about how it affects them. Maybe you have dealt with people like this, and were frustrated by their behavior.

2. They Have a Sense of Entitlement

Selfish people have an innate thought that they deserve what they desire.

3. They Rarely Feel Remorseful

A selfish person may have done things to hurt other people, but one thing you won’t catch them doing is feeling remorseful about what they’ve done.

5. They Rarely Consider The Feelings Of Others

Selfish people, generally speaking, don’t care about the thoughts and feelings of others. What’s important to them is always how they themselves feel.

6. They Will Do Anything To Get What They Want

Selfish people tend to be more ambitious in life. Because of their traits of entitlement and self absorption, it’s no wonder they want the best for themselves.

7. They Need To Be The Most Important person In The Room

Since they care little for the opinion of others, selfish people think of others as below them. They may feel that they are the most important person in any group.

What are the characteristics of selfishness?

First, let’s define the term. The two primary characteristics of selfishness are: 1 Being concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself. 2 Having no regard for the needs or feelings of others.

How to deal with selfish people?

With that in mind, the following are 4 tips to deal with the selfish people in your life: 1. Understand where they are coming from.

What is selfishness in the American dream?

The definition of selfishness is: personal gain at the expense of others. So its not "selfish" to have a family out of a need to be a part of something special. THATS called (part of) the American dream. Its important to distinguish the true meaning of selfishness here.

What does it mean when someone says you are selfish?

What it probably means is that they want you to be doing something else —which might be right for them, but not necessarily for you.

Is selfishness a big issue?

Selfishness is a big issue these days. Books have been written about narcissism, “Generation Me,” even "healthy" selfishness. But when someone you have to deal with regularly is consistently self-involved and self-centered, they can make your life miserable.

1. Look at your relationships

Are these relationships ones that are only self-serving to you? Or do you feel an equal sense of love and gratitude? Ultimately, the most fulfilling relationships are those where you equally receive and give.

2. Understand the motive behind your actions

Are the actions that you take focused around how you will feel better and benefit most? Are you searching for instant gratification? Take a step back and connect with love and purpose. That is the true and most fulfilling motive.

3. Be compassionate to the selfish part of yourself

Although I wasn’t aware of this selfishness for a long period of time, I still see its presence. It gives an illusion of control and serves many of us to ease sadness or fear. So be compassionate and loving to this part of yourself. Nurture it like you would nurture a small child.

4. There is beauty in imperfections

We are all human. We all have flaws. It’s just a matter of your perception of these flaws. If it means you always have a desire to gain something, start giving more. And give more with no expectation. It is truly by self-forgetting that your find yourself.

5. Fear is an illusion

Fear lives in the baggage we carry from the past or the anxiety about the future. It takes us out of the present moment and leads to a lot of pain and discomfort. Fear is nothing more than false evidence appearing real. As long as we stay in the moment and connect with what is, we can tap into the infinite sources of wisdom we harness within.

The Importance of Saying No

When you learn the art of saying no, you begin to look at the world differently. Rather than seeing all of the things you could or should be doing (and aren’t doing), you start to look at how to say yes to what’s important.

How Do You Say No Without Feeling Guilty?

Deciding to add the word “no” to your toolbox is no small thing. Perhaps you already say no, but not as much as you would like. Maybe you have an instinct that if you were to learn the art of no that you could finally create more time for things you care about.

What is moralizing with terms like "selfish"?

Moralizing with terms like “selfish” is the psychological equivalent of using fists or weapons. It all starts in childhood, for most people. Other children place a claim on a child’s toys because they’re uncivilized. That’s why we call them children; they’re immature, and they don’t know any better.

What to say when someone calls you selfish?

What to Say When Someone Calls You “Selfish”. Watch out when people call you “selfish.”. They’re trying to paralyze you with guilt. When you’re paralyzed, you will tend to comply. The term “selfish” isn’t about morality at all; it’s about control. When people call others selfish, they are really saying “you are doing something I don’t want you ...

What does it mean when someone benefits from selflessness?

The moment that person benefits from your selflessness, he or she is experiencing some kind of selfish benefit to him- or herself. In order to attain the moral “ideal” of self-sacrifice, someone else must become immoral.

What does it mean to set your mind against reality?

Setting your mind against reality — trying to keep track of what lies you told, and what’s true — is hardly self-interested, not in any rational sense of the term. ...

What does "go mind your own business" mean?

Go mind your own business.” [from Thomas Malone’s book, “In Defense of American Ideals”] Psychologically, the use of the term “selfish” is always motivated by control. Sometimes the control is for a good thing, as in: “Don’t be selfish. Be honest, tell the truth, don’t mislead people.”.

Is guilt a substitute for morality?

Instilling guilt is not a substitute for advancing a code of morality. Instead of saying, “Don’t be selfish, you moral scoundrel,” the moralizing, preaching politician (or family member) should say, “Here’s my case for why you should do this. Let me persuade you, if I may.”.

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