That is very worrisome. It is not insulting to suggest both boundaries and therapy to your mother. In fact, it might not only help your relationship but it might change the trajectory of your mom's life. My guess is that her neediness is a problem in all sorts of relationships. article continues after advertisement.
It is not your responsibility as a daughter to take care of your mother. You have a right to a quiet and safe emotional space particularly when you are home. You also have a right to spend time with your friends. You have the responsibility to grow up. I suggest that you have a discussion with your mother about how she is making you feel. This will be informative for her. Yes, she might act hurt but more importantly it will be good for your relationship. Your mother needs to learn about boundaries with you. It sounds to me like your mother might benefit from therapy. I am very concerned about her saying that she can't live without you. That is very worrisome. It is not insulting to suggest both boundaries and therapy to your mother. In fact, it might not only help your relationship but it might change the trajectory of your mom's life. My guess is that her neediness is a problem in all sorts of relationships.
Subjects act, whereas objects are acted upon. “I” is a subject because when used in a sentence, you’re talking about something that you do. This is why we would say “I went to the shop” and not “me went to the shop”. “Me” is an object because it’s used when something happens to you.
Let’s take the sentence “My family and I will get through this”. This sentence is accurate because if we remove “My family and” we get “I will get through this”. Which is a grammatically correct sentence.
At this point, you may be wondering about passive sentences. This is where the subject of the sentence is being acted upon.
Helping your parents to get back on track financially may require a little creativity on your part but you need to consider every alternative. For example, if they own their home outright you may want to suggest taking on a reverse mortgage or even selling it altogether. Downsizing may make sense if they’re not able to keep up with the maintenance on the home and it frees up some much-needed cash. They could use the money to buy something smaller or stash it in the bank and opt to rent instead.
Your parents may be reluctant to talk about money especially when they’re struggling, but knowing what the numbers look like can help you find a starting point. Start by adding up all of the money they have coming in each month. This includes salary if either of them are still working, pension benefits and distributions from retirement accounts. If they’re eligible for Social Security, you should make sure they’re getting the most benefits possible.
Before you decide to cut off your parents you need to think about why they’ve turned to you for help in the first place. For instance, is their situation the result of something they couldn’t control or can you chalk it up to poor financial decisions? Understanding what’s at the root of their troubles with money may be able to guide you towards a solution that works for everyone.
Talk to someone. Find someone outside the family to talk about world events with. I would chew the latest updates over with my friends and it eased my stress tremendously. My husband and I made sure to connect every day at some point without the kids.
Listen. Sometimes kids just ramble and they don’t want you to solve problems or judge. Just saying things out loud relieves the pressure. If there was something that needed addressing, I circled back around to it in a more quiet moment.